Turns out the beams of light that distracted a pilot near Dallas were not the work of another obnoxious kid with a laser pointer, but search lights installed on the roof of the Bombshells Nude Cabaret to attract customers.
“I’m the passenger in 9C," said the stranger on the flight deck. "I want to know who will be flying because my friends and I are going to judge the landing in Chicago on a scale from one to ten."