Monday, October 23, 2006
Sexy is the new scary

For Halloween last year I found this fabulously hideous dress at a thrift store, obviously some unfortunate soul's prom dress from the 1960s or '70s. It was powder blue, pleated and made me look like a giant jellyfish.

My date threw on a mustard-colored, three-piece corduroy suit, got me a cheesy carnation corsage and we hit a friend's party as an old-school prom couple.

I was the only female at the party wearing more than two yards of fabric. I counted three Naughty Nurses, two Sexy Cops, some Sexy School Girls, and Sexy Bumblebees … bumblebees! When did bumblebees get sexy?

Nurses and French maids have become so old-hat that costumers have turned to sexy anything. Just cruise through popular costume Web sites and you'll find midriff-baring, thigh-skimming, cleavage-popping get-ups galore.

"Looking sexy is now considered normal, feminine behavior for a woman, so on a day like Halloween, women will take it as creative license to wear revealing clothing and no one can call them a tramp that day," said Donna Gough, an assistant professor of women's studies at Cal State Fullerton. "And for men, it's a day where they can openly stare at and drool over women in such attire without being called a chauvinist pig."

Leg Avenue Costumes, which bills itself as one of the largest wholesalers of sexy adult guises, started seven years ago with French Maid and Schoolgirl. Now the company offers 250 costumes in its 300-page catalog. Its most popular costume? Pirates (22 pirate get-ups, to be exact), followed by fairies, witches, bees, ladybugs and group-themed costumes such as Alice in Wonderland and "The Wizard of Oz."

At Santa Ana-based Halloweenshop.com, owner Rick Tuinenburg said sales of skimpy costumes have spiked in the past few years and the best-selling costume for women so far is, "basically anything with a short skirt." Of course, no sexy outfit is complete without the mandatory thigh-high stockings and garter belts.

"The message being sent for a woman is that you have to wear these costumes to fit in and be normal and be considered attractive and appealing to men," said Gough.

Among the notable offerings this year: There's Sexy Sherlock Holmes, which comes with a dangerously short houndstooth-check skirt, matching cape and hat and even a magnifying glass.

Then there's Sexy Tin Man Girl, a silver vinyl bustier-mini dress with a matching pointy hat. Oh, and there's even a "Sexatary" costume with a midriff-baring halter with a short tie and an itsy-bitsy skirt. I suppose the eyeglasses nail home the "secretary" part of the oh-so-clever disguise.

My personal favorites? A three-way tie between Sexy Pizza Delivery Girl, which comes with a pizza-box prop (alas, it was deemed too hot to show in our family paper); Sexy Executioner, which comes with a hooded mask, faux-leather booty shorts but no ax; and "Ella Mental Adult," which actually consists of a straitjacket minidress with restraints. I would imagine it would be difficult to party or go to the bathroom in that outfit, but last I checked, it was sold out at Buycostumes.com.

In the interest of full disclosure, I was once Sexy Medusa. I was 24. At the time, I thought Medusa was way cooler than a nurse or cop – enough to justify the low-cut neckline and its thigh-high slits.

Another time, back in college, I hadn't planned on going to the big Greek Halloween bash, but after watching all my sorority sisters getting ready at the house, I changed my mind. I went into my closet and threw together an old plaid miniskirt, white button-down shirt, knee-high socks and a pair of glasses to transform myself into … the Asian Britney Spears. Yes, it haunts me to this day. (Now, now, before you call me names, the year before that, I went as a '50s diner waitress, complete with a hairnet and cat-eye glasses. Not sexy at all.)

In the spirit of finding a good compromise for anyone out there who hasn't yet found a costume, I have a few ideas that are both scary and sexy:

•Sexy Grandma in a droopy leather bustier. Totally.

•Sexy Zombie (with chunks of flesh falling off the face). In a bikini. On roller skates.

•Sexy Clown. In a vinyl skirt. Because seriously, what's hotter than a big red foam nose and rainbow Afro wig?

Anyone? Hello?